My "First" Cigarette

Article: 5335 of alt.sex.fetish.smoking
Newsgroups: alt.sex.fetish.smoking
Subject: My "First" Cigarette
Date: 21 Dec 1995 22:10:28 GMT

After my husband found ASFS on the net, I sent a reply to a few guys who 
had posted articles on how much they love to see women smoke.  I was 
fascinated since I thought my husband was the only person in the world 
with this "fetish".  Well, everyone responded enthusiastically, so I'll 
give this a try!  I used to write in college so this should be fun for me 
and hopefully enjoyable for all of you!  (It doesn't seem there are too 
many women in the group-maybe this is strictly a "guy" thing?)

I stopped smoking in 1987 for a number of reasons and it just about 
destroyed my marriage.  My daughter was very young and I was concerned 
about the impression I was making.  I knew my husband loved for me to 
smoke and I had started initially to please him.  I was surprised at how 
fast I got "hooked" and was smoking about a pack a day (I smoke Virginia 
Slim menthol lights-my very favorite). 

So I knew if I ever started again, I would be hooked for life!  This past 
year had been very stressful in many areas of my life.  My work is very 
fast paced and we are constantly under tight deadlines.  I work in an 
office with four other women (who all smoke by the way!) and I had very 
much wanted to start again but was afraid to bring the subject up with my 
husband or have to discuss it with my daughter.  (I should have been 
upfront but didn't want to risk an argument.   He had told me many times 
how the last time I quit had almost been too much to take.  I had no idea 
how much some men love to watch us smoke!)

Anyway, after working there a year and coming home smelling of smoke 
(which always elicited a wiff and a sigh from my husband) I reached a 
point this past summer when the stress level was off the scale!  In early 
June, I came home early and "caught" my husband smoking on the deck 
behind our house.  I played it cool and didn't say anything.  Besides, he 
would occasionally have a cigarette now and then when he was home alone, 
so that wasn't any big deal.  The next day, I went in to my office 
manager's office (where everyone goes to smoke) to discuss something with 
her and she had just lit a cigarette.  Suddenly, I had to have a 
cigarette.  I didn't care what kind, I just had to have one!  I said, 
"Give me one of those cigarettes"!  She looked up at me and said, "No, 
Cathy, I'm not going to be responsible for you starting smoking"!   I 
told her, "I'm an adult and it's not your responsibility.  Either give me 
one or I'll go to the cafeteria and buy a pack!"  So she offered me her 
pack and I reached out for my first cigarette in 8 years!  I could feel 
the anticipation building as she offered me her lighter.  I could hardly 
wait for the tingle of that first puff or the thrill of watching the 
smoke plum as I exhaled!  I took the lighter, flicked it, and inhaled 
deeply.  It was even better than I remembered!!!  I savored each puff and 
stubbed it out in her ashtray, feeling a pleasant dizzy sensation wash 
over me.  At lunch, I headed for the cafeteria and bought my first pack.  
I picked up a pack of Capri menthol, thinking the ultra slim cigarette 
would look very feminine.

That evening when I got home, my husband asked me how my day and been. I 
answered nonchalantly that it went well and that I had had a cigarette at 
the office.  He stopped dead in his tracks and said, "You did what?!  You 
better not be smoking again!"  I thought, "Oh, God, he's really upset.  
What have I done"?  I asked why he was so upset and he said he knew how 
easily I get addicted and told me I'd better stop before I start.  Then 
he quickly added, "Or start and promise me you'll never make me go 
through what I went through 8 years ago!"  We laughed and hugged and 
headed out to the deck to have a cigarette together.  It was just like 
old times and I had never seen him so happy!  He just kept telling me 
over and over how great this was and that he couldn't believe how lucky 
he was.  I guess I feel like the lucky one because I not only have my 
husband's total support, but have my cigarettes back with me again!

If people enjoyed this, I'd be glad to tell you more of my (our) 
experiences involving smoking.  I would love to tell about the gold 
lighter my husband gave me that Friday during a romantic dinner-in the 
smoking section!!  Please feel free to email me.  I like hearing from 
you!